dirt jake replicas: News

june 30th
That Ain’t Working. That’s The Way You Do It.
(day 14)

MTV!
MANCHESTER!
Somehow someone thought that we were special enough to be on one of the largest music television programs in England!
This has easily been one the days I have been most excited about. Well…sort of. What is supposed to go down keeps changing. Initially it was supposed to be an interview and a live performance and then it changed to playing to a BACKING TRACK! What are we Ashley Simpson? Nope…so then they said we would be doing a music video instead or acoustic….pffff…..and well. We were not really sure what to expect when we pulled up to the most incredibly strange…but still cool building on earth.
Honestly it took us forever to get inside the thing! We had no clue where the door was because it is all glass. I pressed the intercom button and the guy gave me directions to get in but I couldn’t hear him….and not wanting to ask again I just so “oh okay!” well…that didn’t work. We still didn’t know where to go. So I had to go back to the intercom again. Dumbass.
When we actually made it up to the studio it became a race to get us the hell out!
Apparently there will be no interview at all….and Adam, Julius and I will not even be mentioned at all….instead it is going to be only Dakota and Ashley performing to our cd….at least they actually had to sing( the vocals were cut off the cd. It was actually great to just relax on the comfy couches and watch them perform. But the race was on. The sound man basically came in and set everything up in seconds and was out of the room. It seemed as though within a minute the track was playing and they were off. Ashley and Dakota KICKED ASS! It was really awesome. For being so early the just went off and it was nice to see them blast it out. The track ended and they let out the dogs.
We were escorted out of the building…given a nice big fake smile and bammm…out on the street.
It was awesome!!!!
The coolest part for me was watching this group of kids stare in through the windows at us. They were totally intrigued.
One thing I have noticed about this tour. It is really easy for people to think that you are famous or rich or I guess well known? You know how rappers where tons of bling bling? And spend way too much on stupid shit to act like they have money? And some people fall for it and actually think that are kick ass because of their getup? I finally realized that it is easy to “fool” people. NOT that we were trying to do that at all…it just sort of happened that people were drawn to us because of some of the things we were doing or because of where we are from.
It was really cool having the little kids watching us. It made me feel like what we were doing was actually important….being able to see them so interested was a nice change from what we are used to.

See the thing about todays show is that there is none!
The freakin venue burnt to the ground…wait…my mistake that was the other venue. This venue just closed and we were unable to find another venue to let us in (big surprise.)
But the cool thing is that it gave us a night to be with Brian and Jane and Isobel!
We asked them out on a date (sex?…fingers crossed!)!!!!!

This night was the BEST night.
We went to a restaurant that they had picked out and sat in the back corner.
We started the night off with drinks of course….hobgoblin I believe the name was….nice nice nice indeed! Highlights highlights ‡Ashley will most likely hate me forever for mentioning it but she accidentally spilled her drink all over herself right away….so she was soaked the whole night long. And then Dakota pulled the emergency cord in the handicap bathroom because he thought it was a light switch and the alarm was going off FOREVER!!! Fucking hilarious…and we were seated right next to it so it was blasting in our ears! Brian said that we had been “prank calling” or “pocket dialing” them at all hours of the morning! And then had said that Jane had answered and scremed “ YOU CUNTS!” not knowing that it was us….later she said she still would have said it even if she knew it was us! Hahaha. The food came and apparently Ashley was just having a bummer of a day and the pepper shaker opened up on her food L. We gave the family and autographed guitar as a present for letting us stay at the house which was nice…but the coolest part of dinner was when we were discussing movies and we were talking about the Blair Witch Project. Brian was describing the ending and then he held up his arm and honest to god all the hair was standing straight up!!!! It was soooooo kick ass!!!!!
After food there were more drinks and then we decided to head back to Brians homestead for a few more. They took us through the backroads, which were basically one lane roads…through huge fields and under sweet bridges. We had no clue where we were going and I think even the GPS was lost but it was one of the coolest roads we went on the whole tour.
When we arrived we opened up a bottle of whine and had warm Stella and watched the sunset from the backyard. For a minute I forgot we were on tour. Again it was like hanging out with one of our good friends…just having drinks and enjoying ourselves. I really STILL cannot get over how great that is. The friendships we have made while on tour made it totally worth every second of effort and money that we put into it.
We climbed over the couches in the livingroom….spreadout…buzzed….relaxed…and watched some TV shows together. There were some of the most comfortable moments of silence at this point.
When we left, it was actually sad.
Anyone reading this…I have never been the kind of person to care about traveling around the world sight seeing and doing all of that stuff. It just has never interested me. But now…if I could suggest one thing. It would be:
Start a band (preferably a kick ass band)
Then go on tour.
And talk to AS MANY PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE.
I swear that you will not regret it in any way. Even the strange, or angry, and crazy ones are great.
This is becoming less and less about music and more and more about relationships and friendships and all of the cheesy stuff.
Its cool when things in your life change right before your eyes and your are able to see it happen and sit back and enjoy.
Sleep well.
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 29th
Meeting People Is Easy
(day 13)

Aye aye!
As odd as it is to say it…dirt jake replicas playing in a pirate bar is really not a big surprise to me. It really almost fits us…not that we are pirates, or even huge fans of pirates (to me the only reason to watch pirates of the caribbean is because of how hot keira knightly is.) It fits because it is probably the most odd situation possible. Odd as hell. And for some reason, ODD follows us…maybe even hunts us?
Hark to Towler is the name of this pirate venue.
And our soundman/ booker/ promoter/ real pirate host is Jon. He is AMAZING! So cheerful. It is obvious that he has just found his way out of bed at 4 pm…a long night partying with a deep purple cover band. I get the vibe that he loves his job and music and also just people in general.
There is a dart board in the back room which is also said to be haunted!!! That’s right…we have officially become obsessed! We have been asking everyone for as many ghost stories as possible!!! Now that I think about it….i just realized that ODD doesn’t follow us…nor hunt us….i think we unintentionally hunt odd.
Back to darts. It has been so long since I have played. Probably…shit….12 years? It is kick ass though! I love friendly competition…games….DARTS!
The bartenders name is Matt and he is just a younger guy, also full of smiles and not anxious at all. We hook him up with some gear and I decide it is time for a drink. I wanted to try something different something that is not in the states…I ask for something nonalcoholic and he gives me the worst tasting drink EVER! I took one sip and that was the end of it. I pass it along to everyone….even matt cringes!!!! But leave it to Julius to take the beer on! He takes a swig and shakes a little bit…”it tastes like toast!” but then keeps on drinking! Hahahhaa
Some time passes and i am on the edge of falling asleep…I actually think Julius is asleep. Dakota and Ashley come bursting in “GET YOUR SHIT! WE MUST GO NOW!!!!”we get up and follow them….not really sure what adventure we are going on…its not really important to know. Just go. We take off out the back of the building and down the street and cross through this small park and then a bocce field.

My face hurts from smiling and I think a small tear glides down my cheek. This is what we have been waiting for. THE FUCKING BEST PLAYGROUND IN THE WORLD!
A GIGANTIC ROCK WALL…CRAZY QUICK SPINNY THING….AND THE WINNER FOR BEST RIDE ON EARTH…..TWO MAN SPIN IN THE AIR KDJFBIAURGFIUAERGB THING!!!!!!
Like five year olds we drop our bags and cameras and drinks and spread out towards all the exciting toys ahead of us….i race for the same one as Dakota and get caught behind him slightly….”oh my god get out of my way!!!” one shoulder and then the other….a race!
There is only one thing to do….A VIDEO BLOG! Please check the video section of our site…we did a killer blog on the play ground!!! The end is priceless!
When we arrived back at the venue…aye aye!! We were full of dirt, sweat, and blisters!
WANG!
The show was fun for me because I broke a string for the first time on stage and had to replace it as fast as possible…and a few other things went wrong that normally would cause us to get really bent out of shape. I think since being on tour we have really learn to not sweat the small stuff. And to be honest, it has really helped our show because we are getting more and more relaxed. You can sense the comfort level increasing with each performance.
Although the show was fun for me….i think the overall opinion of the show was pretty poor from our point of view. I am not speaking for everyone….but I really felt like we were all a little disappointed at the end of the show. But at least they had a fog machine!!!
The crowd really loved us though. It was cool. We met some really great people and chatted for a while.
The coolest thing for me was after the show because Andy and Dani (andys daughter) came AGAIN! Their third show!!!! By the end of the night it is obvious they are now a part of our family. We talked for hours…mostly about music…but a little bit about girth brooks as well! I really can’t stress it enough…how great it was to just meet so many positive people on tour. Andy and Dani are two of the greatest people I’ve ever met. They go to concerts all the time together…which I think is so cool. And there was never even a second of awkwardness. When they came in they walked right over and it was as if we had made a plan to meet them out at the bar for drinks. “Hey guys! Pull up a chair!”
I really don’t mean to go on and on about an encounter that might not be super exciting for all of you…but it is really hard to deny the fact that there are great interesting people around you at all times that you never get the chance or get enough courage to start a conversation with…and you could be missing out on so many killer stories and adventures.
Hmmm…this kind of feels like a Walt Disney Movie.
I’m a little uncomfortable now. Hey have a good night everyone. If you ever get a chance to go to a pirate bar….do it.
Sleep well
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

p.s. watch the video blog on our myspace site!

june 28th
Zombie. Zombie.
(day 12)

Why do people love cover bands? I can’t think of even one person I know that has ever said to me that they love a cover band or a tribute band. But somehow shows are always PACKED when one is playing.
This happened today.
But unfortunately the “packed” venue was connected to our venue and our crowd was less than last nights show! After our set was complete we could hear over a hundred people screaming and clapping…but only because the band on the other stage had just finished playing a Cranberries cover.
This is something that, I would think, gets a lot of original bands bummed out. I’ve grown to laugh at it more than get upset by it lately but today it is really odd. We even talked to half the crowd before we went in to setup our gear and gave them free cds and fliers and let them know we were on tour from the states and not a single person came in. As for the musicians in these style bands…I totally understand that some people just want to play and have fun and are not out to “change things”. And some people play instruments for 20 years and never attempt to write their own song. I know this happens and if that is what someone wants to do then great…..whatever makes you happy. But I guess it would be great if the FANS were more open to new music. There are so many great bands out there that could blow you away if you gave them the chance. This has happened so many times…even on this tour. EVEN AT THIS SHOW! A band called kill it kid just knocked me down and kicked my face in. I am a fan for life.
To all of the people out there that do give musicians creating original music a chance…..thank you. It is the greatest feeling going into a room full of strangers and playing a show for them and not seeing anyone leave. Or hearing people clap. It makes all the hours spent everyday working on our art worth every second.
Today was really just another day in the “normal” tour grind. We played in Norwich, which was a MASSIVE drive. We continued to speak to as many people as possible and pass out tons of merch. Ashley showed me a place to get some wicked hummus which was awesome. But the best part of the morning was remembering that we had the football! We tossed it around the parking lot for a while and then Andy Slade pulled in!
Andy Slade is a promoter/ pit-viper label owner.
He was not at all what I pictured him to look like. I like when that happens. This man is incredible. Full of positive energy and excitement. He actually worked his ass off to get us in town at the last minute because a venue that we had previously booked had burnt down. He worked nonstop during the night. Running back and forth to take pictures and video tape then to cheer and right back to the door to check and see if anyone wanted in….nope~
The stage was really cool and the sound man Jake was great too. The whole night went perfectly and again it was exciting playing to just a few people…and people that really enjoyed what we are doing.
After the show we spoke to Andy for a little while. Just relaxed and laughed at all the people missing out on the three great original bands that had played tonight. When we pulled out of the parking lot, it was as if we were again leaving a great friend behind. It is great when you can become so attached to someone after just a few hours of time spent together.
The drive home was pretty rough today. Very long again, and having to keep my eyes out for the millions of rabbits that were on the side of the road eating! Maybe I only saw 8 or 9…but that is still a ton!
Oh I also had a freaking owl swoop down right inn front of the van and fly in front of us for a little stretch of the backs roads! That was cool….probably not for the bunnies though. The road we were traveling had signs along it declaring the amount of people that had been killed on it in the past year. Great news.
At one point there was a semi that had begun to swerve just as I was about to pass it. The whole back end came whipping into the lane I was in and then slammed back in line with his land only to fling its ass out once more towards us. It freaked me out because it stopped as far as the center of our lane!!! Not just a drifter here. All in all it woke me up a little bit and helped me make it home. “woke me up” might be a slight understatement.
Sleep well
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 27th
Dead Bodies Everywhere
(day 11)

The morning began with laughter.
Pretty nice when yesterday ended in yelling.
An apology was still due and I kicked it out.
No time to think about it any longer…we have more important shit to
do…like some kick ass shows!
I think Oldham is kind of what I pictured when I thought of touring the
UK. A really small town…fields everywhere with sheep scattered throughout.
The landscape is very similar to the movie Children Of Men. (awesome
movie). It feels like we have gone back in time. I love it here.
The venue is a converted hotel and seems to be the only place to see music in town.
After we setup our gear Dakota and I run and grab some calzones. Two
veggie for Ashley and myself and on meaty mother for Dakota, while Julius and Adam go snag some Chinese??? I think??
On the drive back Dakota hit a parked car in front of the venue! Thank god for getting full coverage!!! It was sweet because the lady didn’t want to even come in the parking lot to look at her car because it was slightly sprinkling! Hahaha!
After eating, a group of FIVE MILLION little kids came from upstairs in the building and stormed the merch table. Dakota had to drop kick a few of them to get away with what shirts he could save!
It was awesome. They were screaming and going crazy! We have every kid in
that town as our fan!
OH!!! Something really cool happened while we were getting food…I will tell you that at the end of the blog!
We spent around forty minutes trying to set up our sign! It was so fucking
funny seeing everyone giving options and trying their hardest to get it to
stay! The bartender was awesome and he took over and really made it
totally worth while.
Right before we went on, in walked Andy! Andy is a guy that saw us in leeds last night and wanted to see us again while he could. This man is
amazing. Another person that just is so generous and full of life. And he brought his AMAZING daughter! She is one of the most laidback, confident, happy girls I have ever met. I could hang with the two of them for hours
and hours and never have it be awkward. I really like the people that I have met out here.
The rain really started to come down and no one else came to the show. We
played for maybe five people. But it was great because the two of them were there so we really had fun playing just for them. I think Julius said
that this was his favorite sounding show. Okay okay….I can’t wait anymore…I feel like I can’t do this blog any justice because I am SUPER distracted by what happened while we were getting calzones. (which would have been 10 times better with a little Franks Red Hot!!!!)
So Ashley stayed behind to watch the gear and the soundman and bartender
began to tell her a local murder story!!!!! Keep in mind this place is creepy to begin with. Straight out of a horror movie.
Ashley said it was the perfect setup for a horror movie….”young naïve American band tours tiny town of Oldham and ends up getting slaughtered!”
We decided to dedicate a blog to this particular story.
So please watch it in our video section!
A rough outline is that a man and woman raped and murder fifteen kids in this village and buried them in the fields we drove past while coming in.
The man is still in prison and will not tell where the remaining body is buried. And he has been on a TEN YEAR HUNGER STRIKE!!!! But they keep feeding him!
We thought for sure that we were goners. This story and setting really hit us all. For me it really brought out a
lot emotion that may not have come if we were in a different situation.
But hearing about the parents of the children being so old and on the verge of death but still wanting to know where their children are buried
really got to me. Sad.
You should really check out the video if you get the chance.
Thanks for reading everyone. Sorry my head was out of it today. I am really zoned out on the fact that this happened. Very intrigued but also seeing where they were tossed is kind of overwhelming that someone could repeatedly do that to children.
Sleep well.
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

June 26th
How Did It Start? Oh, I Don’t Know
(day 10)

Trash music venue.
I have been looking forward to this show since the moment I booked it. I don’t know why but I just felt like todays show was going to be amazing. The bands, the venue, the town, the night of the week, I was looking forward to all of it!
But it was cancelled.
Just kidding. He he he. It wasn’t cancelled at all!
This was actually the first show we were able to play with our normal light setup (bright backlights). We ran to Wickes, the UK answer to Home Depot, and picked up a few lights that we will return before we go home. Super excited about being able to use lights!!!
Calming down now, we snagged Brian for this show and he was going off the whole trip to Leeds! Flipping people off as we past them because we were able to go in the carpool lane and they had to sit in traffic!!!! It was awesome!!!!!
Oh…and to flip people off in the UK you have to give them the peace sign backwards…which is something I normally do in the US as I say goodbye….and I unfortunately did it a few times to certain people that had been helping us out sooooo much. I felt like a total ass. “THANK YOU SOOO MUCH!!” while I flip them off.
Pfffff. Idiot.
The venue was great. It is located in a shopping center, There were tons of people to promote to even though it was pissing down rain. I loved promoting here. I was running up and down the street like a fool. I met tons of people.
Ashley, Dakota and I went to repark the van and we found a spot right next to where a wedding was taking place. Which later on that day Dakota was screaming out the window to the bride and groom that since they are married they have to do anal. And he also yelled it at the brides maids. This didn’t go over very well………
mmm….end of that story.
Man so many kick ass things happened this show. I will just give you highlights.
Anola Gray, Hub, and Immune all had kick ass sets, I gave some guy a wedgie and he didn’t kick my ass, we PLASTERED the bathroom in stickers, had a photographer meet us and take photos and offer coming to our TV gig, passed out SOOO much merch to everyone in the venue, got totally wrecked, got Brian totally wrecked, were given free drinks, gained awesome new fans, watched Adam do jumping jacks to wake up, had all of our merch taken from the table (good thing), I peed in some guys front lawn, and had the best show of My life.
I loved this show. I think because I was thinking so positively about it the whole time there was nothing that could get in my way of having a good show.
I was just so excited when I got onstage. I felt like everyone played really well and the crowd loved us. For the first time this tour I really FELT like I was one tour.
I felt great.
After the show I was soaked in sweat and I went to the back on the room and it was one of the first times someone came up to me and said they thought I did well. That never happens to me, it always happens to everyone else in the band, so it was a really big thing for me. I remember sitting back with a pint (by the way pints are bigger in the UK!!) in the back of the venue and just sipping my drink and thinking that I could tour no problem for a long long time.
I feel as though each member of our band had this moment on the tour where they have become comfortable…most likely not the same time or show….but I see how much everyone puts in and to do nothing but play is the ultimate payoff.
Well…nothing but play and work your ass off!
I spoke to a lot of people at this venue…but at the end of the night I found myself at the front of the stage watching the show with Julius and chatting with him in between songs.
It was nice to take it all in.
When it was time to leave I realized that I was WAY too drunk. Not to the point of being sick but to the point of pissing off a lot of the members in our band. I had a hard time caring because I didn’t want this night to end. And I definitely did not want to feel bad for having one of the most fun nights of my life. I was being pretty selfish by being out of my head like that and I paid for it by causing a fight and looking like a dumbass. Considering it was the only fight we had so far on tour I would say that is pretty good!!! But the bad part is that it could have easily been avoided. It is easy to forget the fact that we are all out here on our own with no time to get away from each other and still weeks to go and forced to give up all of our little comforts and trying our hardest to keep everyone else happy but still making sure that our goal is being taken care of, I will definitely try my hardest to make this my only fuck up.
Sleep well…there are some apologies due in the morning.
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 25th
The Kids Aren’t Alright
(day 9)

Shower? What is that?
Oh I remember!!! Yeah sure I will take one!
This is pretty much how it was so far on tour. I think this might be my first shower since we left??…maybe not. It might be my second??? I don’t know. But I know that we have all had to kind of skip out on the wonderful feeling of being clean. The worst part is running out of clean clothes…there is an all-in-one washer dryer in the flat but we haven’t even had time to try to figure it out. But we did through in a load the other night and for some reason they won’t dry…instead they just begin to wash again and again and again. These clothes are fucking CLEAN!
But not dry. So we can’t wear them and we end up draping them throughout the flat. Wet clothes everywhere.
The town of Warsop is also in the middle of nowhere…but it is really a cool little town.
Man…people said to be careful in Glasgow but I was FAR more afraid of the punk kids of Warsop! There were tons of early teenagers that had their bikes and attitudes to match. We tried to flier a few of them …whew….if looks could kill. I mean we are passing out FREE CDS!!! (little side note here…I just tried to begin this last sentence with the word “and” but misspelled it as “nad”) hahahhahaahaha. Whew…I am sorry, I am a child.
Moving on. We are trying to pass out these cds and kids won’t even acknowledge that we are there! It was funny. I guess I was a little badass as a kid too.
The venue was really cool. There was a massive theatre in the back that is supposed to be the venue but they have a problem with people not leaving the bar to check out the bands so they decided to set up the P.A. in the front room and have us play right in front of the bar. Kind of a waste for such a incredible spot but most likely the better idea.
All the groups were cool as hell. I really enjoyed the music throughout the whole night.
And the Stella Artois!
Something that is interesting about playing music for people is that when you first arrive most people don’t say much. But after you play it is as though you had been friends for years and years! This really cool thing happens and suddenly it is a big party and everyone loves each other. After our set (we were the headlining band) we had such a kick ass time talking with everyone. I don’t know if it is just because people are usually drunk by then or because they have something to associate you with.
We were outside behind the venue loading in the van and chatting when a member of one of the bands gave Girth a present! He gave him a PAIR! I think we were able to get some shots of it so we will surely show you.
While passing by I overheard a girl mention something about dares and my ears instantly perked up! Those of you that know me also know that I LOVE dares. So it is time to test her!
I dare her to walk outside and tap Julius on his junk and as him “where is Girth?” (sorry Jane…just wanted to get his reaction on tape!) and she didn’t even ask me twice! She was right out the door and Julius was jumping back ten feet, hands in the air. “What the fuck!?!?!?!” hahahah
I love this kid. I remember the first time I heard him swear. I think it was a year after knowing him. We have corrupted this one for sure!
So obviously the next thing to do was race!
But she had no socks or shoes which means I had to strip down and bare all….from the ankle down. She said I cheated (which I didn’t, I hate cheaters) as I was leaping over the wooden fence at the end of the parking lot and smashing into the grass on the other side.
So again we race…as she begins to count for the take off she starts to haul ass!!!! Freakin cheater. Just as she reaches the fence I am able to catch up and we smack face first into the ground at the same time. Or at least that is what she will tell you J
Perfect way to end out a night. With a big group of new friends and fans waving goodbye as we pull out the parking lot.
On the way home we all seem to be very chill. Finally getting the hang of this thing called tour. Happy to finally play a show. Happy to be on tour. Happy to be away from work and home. Happy to have the opportunity to do such a crazy thing. And happy to have friends and family and fans that chipped in to help us do it.
Today is Matt’s birthday. Matt was the MC at our BBQ. I would say he is DJR’s first fan and definitely one our biggest. Always there to help out and support us. He was also the one to teach us of the Anal car game.
Real quick explanation.
You take any model of car and put the word Anal in front of it and see what crazy things you can come up with.
Example. Anal focus (for the ford focus) Anal Probe( for the Ford Probe) and Anal Expedition starting to get it? On tour we began an Anal Log and ended up with over 100 vehicles that are not in the U.S. and oh my god they are amazing. If you start to play the game, get ahold of us and we will let you know the whole list!
So yeah…back to Matt’s Birthday.
We called him.
That’s about it!
Hahaha. But I think it was the first time we spoke to someone from back home….so it was nice to actually get in touch with someone else.
Definitely miss you all.
Sleep well
- Joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 24th
Going The Distance
(day 8)

In the past few days we have been warned by numerous people to “watch yourself in Glasgow”, or “be careful up there”, even “ DO NOT PRONOUNCE GLASGOW WRONG!” basically all the people in southern England have tried to let us know that it may get a little crazy while we venture off to our only Scotland show! Adam was told that people will even go as far as slitting your lips open with a knife so you look like the joker!!! On a side note, I am pretty pumped to see heath ledger in the dark knight! July 18th!!
Okay…back to it…today, as you may have now guess, we are going the distance. Glasgow.
On the way up Dakota drove, which was nice because I was able to finish a book and also just relax and check out all the rolling hills on the way up. There is really very little between our flat and Glasgow. Just road and grass.
Glasgow is HUGE. It instantly reminds me of a big city, maybe Seattle, not as big as New York but a mini version for sure. The cool thing is that the buildings are sooooo old and they have so much class and beauty. Easily the most interesting and beautiful city I feel we have been to. I think maybe even the most beautiful city I have EVER been to. The venue is located in a tunnel! Which is really cool but seeing as though we have already been told to watch our backs, we actually kind of nervous about going out and seeing what the real situation is. Who knows if they really hate Americans?? Shit…Americans hate Americans! No one is at the venue and I NEED to get the new sigur ros cd. So regardless of the chance of death, it is time to walk around. Adam stays back to rest and watch the van and the four of us begin the search for a cd store.
If you ever go to the U.K. and you can only go to one city, I would suggest going to Glasgow far more than going to London. I loved walking around there. I now pictures won’t do it justice, but I am sure when Ashley posts some, you will hopefully be able to get what I am talking about.
The only cd store in the area is a borders…and honestly I think it is the only open store in town!
I was able to snag one of the remaining copies of the sigur ros cd!!! Luckily I brought a change of underwear to the venue!
Ashley and I wait outside the store for a long ass time while Dakota and Julius search for books. Eventually we decide to just go on without them because Adam has been alone for a long time.
Back at the venue, no one has arrived STILL! And the show is supposed to begin in less than an hour.
Something is up.
There is a mcdonalds just around the corner so we grab the computer and race over.
No excuse, no apology, nothing in the email except “tonights show is cancelled”
TWO NIGHTS IN A ROW!!!
The worst part is that we spent $200 driving up here just to find out.
This can’t happen.
Dakota and I start running from venue to venue in the city. We were carrying the GPS in hand and finding every possible place that might be able to let us jump in and do a show on the fly. “sorry…we can’t” is all we heard. Which makes sense. I guess we are asking a lot. But we had to try. It was cool though because we got to see a lot more of Glasgow and we saw the Barfly venue and also KING TUT’S!!! This was one of the places I tried so hard to book. This is one of the venues the mars volta played when they did their first tour. It would have been kick ass to have a chance to play there. The people there were actually really nice and tried to get us in but the match up of other bands just wouldn’t really fit. I had a blast trying to get another show. Running around in the rain. Sort of like a game….or trying to sell yourself. Pick a destination and run there as fast as possible through all the people because time was running out.
Time did run out. It became too late to get on a bill and we had to just give up.
I think everyone was afraid that the rest of the tour would be filled with cancelled shows.
Shit happens you know? And sometimes two days in a row. All in all it was a good time in the tour to not be stressed about playing. It worked out really well. I drove home and it took us FOREVER to get out of the city! All the on ramps for the highway were closed!!!! Once we hit the highway everyone crashed out. A few hours later I heard Adam playing his DS and he checked on me to make sure I wasn’t going to fall asleep and cruise the van off of a cliff. Sending us smashed and burning the whole way down.
“Nope…I am fine. Thanks.” Hahaha. He probably wishes he hadn’t said anything at all because then we started to chat about movies. When Adam and I get together and discuss movies it always ends up being a LOOOOOOOOOOONG conversation. What is good about it is that we have pretty similar taste in movies and the certain parts of movies so we get WAY TOO excited about it!
Then Dakota woke up and joined in and we spent the last two hours of the trip trying to convince each other what the best scary movie of all time is.
Finally parking the van in our spot I checked out the clock and saw it was 2am! Damn. Imagine if we did play the show!!! We would not have been home until maybe 5 in the morning. THANK GOD IT WAS CANCELLED!
And in reality I think everyone said the same thing….even though we spent a lot of money and time getting up there. We were glad that we didn’t find out about the show until after we were already there because we would have missed out on such a killer city.
Everything happens for a reason.
Sleep well
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

p.s. !!!!!! I FORGOT! THE NEW SIGUR ROS CD IS AMAZING!!!! GET IT!

june 23rd
You've Got Yourself A Broken Tomb.
day (7)

“OPEN YOUR EYES AND GET UUUUUUUP!”
god damn it was so hard to get up this morning. I thought about throwing a tantrum like a five year old would do….or at least I felt like it. I just wanted to sleep. And by the looks of it I think Ashley and Julius may have felt the same way. The three of us got up after basically no sleep to go and get the tire switch and then put back on the van this morning. It’s important….that’s what I kept telling myself. We have a lot of driving to do today.
A ton of funny things happened at the tire center (tyre center) but honestly I was just so grumpy and ready to pass back out that I am trying to block this part of the day out of my mind! Oh and Julius awoke and drove with us only to use the internet, which we did not do…so he got up for nothing! Sorry again man.
Whew…and now we drive. Drive drive drive back down the same road we traveled on twice yesterday to only five minutes from the venue we played at. (we tried to find a hotel but it didn’t pan out.) We are on our way to the radio station Rock 94.7 because for THREE HOURS we will take over and play all the music and do a huge interview!
The DJ was Steve Payne, super nice guy that just loves his job…excited to talk and meet people. He LOVES girth brooks also! I think we spent more time discussing the story behind our band mascot than anything else.
It was really fun just taking the morning off to joke and listen to music (well something besides a perfect circle….which is great music but it has been the only cd we have listened to while driving….EVERYDAY.) and the funny thing is that the first song we picked was an a perfect circle song.
It was three hours of madness.
We talked about the new burger king burger that cost $185, The Daily Sport which is a newpaper that is full of nude girls and grannies looking for some action, driving in the UK , and of course the tour. The coolest part was that we had a total of 12,200 listeners!!!!!
Amazing! And then we also called FOX 12 in Portland and the broadcast a little segment about us and our tour on the air! Thanks to our favorite band bitch Dan!!! Seriously though. Thank you Dan.
And we made sure to mention and PLAY our favorite Portland bands at the same time! That’s right…there of course was the Catfight! and Amara and geez….TONS of bands we tried to speak of and direct to their sites.
After the interview ended we met up with Simon the manager of the station…he seemed so excited about the show….he loved our music and was just genuine about everything. It really made me feel great about what we were doing. It was sad to say goodbye (especially for Steve and Girth) but we had a show to go to in leeds so we must move on.
AGAIN down the long roady road….around and around the roundabouts.
Leeds is my favorite town so far. There is something here for me. I guess in a way it is similar to Portland. Lots of young people…big music town….really laidback. Whew….feels good to be home.
Welllllll at least for the first fifteen minutes. Then we find out the show has been cancelled! Hahahaha….horrible.
And for the worst reason. Because one of the door handles broke in the venue!
HAHAHHA so we spent soooo much time and effort and money to play the show and it is cancelled over a door handle. Kind of like the movie garden state “ its amazing to think how much of my life has been determined by a three inch piece of plastic.”
Dakota is really beat up on the situation because he booked the show and spent a lot of time trying to find the bands. Obviously not his fault though, we go back and try to talk it over with the venue and decide to find another venue to jump on. This lasts for over and hour…maybe closer to two and during this process we meet this cool guy that built a house out of stone….he carried the stone by hand and he could only get around five stones out each day. It took him seven years to do it! Awesome.
Eventually we find ourselves in a open mic bar. Pretty much the only thing open on a Monday. After talking to regular there we discuss the pros and cons of doing a show here…after a raise of hands we figured it is more trouble than it is worth and make the long walk back to the car to go home and actually rest one night! Valiant effort though.
But you have heard this story before….do we rest?
Of course not.
Instead we stop and get some beer and get trashed and make an ouija board out of a cardboard box that was made for a guitar.
Lights out, Candles strewn throughout the flat, a half empty bottle of some stella artois rip off on my crossed legs. Julius to my left, then Ashley, and finally Dakota completing the circle on my right. We add a few extra words on the board. Our band name along with everyones names along the side. Adam had already crashed out so there was just enough room for our fingers to cram onto the homemade marker. This is something all of us are equally fascinated by but have never openly discussed any of this with each other. Trust is normally an issue you would have while playing, or I guess “exploring” with this device. But that is probably the last thing on our minds. Trust is first thing we needed to have for each other when we met, being five complete strangers and all.
We begin.
Keep in mind that this is an old Victorian hospital that we are staying in. already a creepy place. It gets far worse.
You know….i take that back. It gets far better!
For well over and hour we watch as the marker zooms across the board…spelling out exact answers without missing a single letter. Back and forth, yes and no, this and that. My arms cramped in pain…I couldn’t stop…not until the marker basically blasted itself off the board. A sure sign to us that is was time to stop.
I feel that what happened that night was really personal and I guess if you are really interested then we will most likely let you know what was said and what strange events took place…but I must say they were super intense, Girth Brooks was not involved, and it shocked the hell out of all of us.
Try to sleep well
-joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 22nd
I watched you change
(day 6)

It was bound to happen.
And it did.
Vehicle problems!
We woke up this morning and Julius pointed out that our rear American drivers side tire was pregnant. A massive bubble, the size of a fist, was poking out of the sidewall of our tire and we were supposed to already be on the road.
Dakota chatted with the rental people and they said they could have someone out to fix it in over an hour so we decide to find a tire center.
Apparently we were not the only people that had tire problems today! Hahaha they were completely booked today.
Another stupid decision had to be made.
Just shut up and drive! That’s right…although the chances of the tire exploding and the van rolling, flipping, and bursting into flames, killing us all and probably three other car loads of people going to their jobs as though do every morning, we really really good. We felt it was the only option to make the gig on time.

After hours of driving around four million roundabouts we pulling into the bikers pub.
Cool thing about renting a car is they can send someone ANYWHERE. Good for us. We called and a super cool guy came out to put on the donut…which we could have done on our own but we thought he was going to change the tire.
So now we must drive home again…hours again with millions of roundabouts…..with a wheel that is half the size of a normal wheel. Pretty cool especially since the van is mega packet with gear in the back end!

Always an adventure.
A ton of cool things happened today, played with great bands, ran some red lights, the GPS almost ran out of battery life leaving us screwed, a drunk girl loaded into our van after falling face first on the ground, and well soooo much more. But two stories really stuck out amongst the others.
First one is that Ashley and myself drive around coalville in search of a pay phone to call Denise, our lovely PR friend that has done such a kickin’ job, we find the phone and as I am talking to her, finding out the super cool news for the day, I see a kid hiding in the phone booth next to us. I assume he is just relaxing, getting out of the wind or something. But Ashley has her eyes on him and listens in to what he is doing instead of my phone conversation. The kid apparently was super paranoid and searching around and around. He had a backpack. I would guess that he was in his teens, thin, and he sported a dirty blonde buzz cut. After a few minutes the kid burst out of the phone booth running at full speed down the street. Ashley said that he was talking with someone and obviously running from someone which he eventually revealed that is was the cops. I don’t recall all of the details, and looking at this blog it really doesn’t convey how strange and kick ass it was. But trust me. Bangin’.
Moving on to the super cool part about today.
When I was on the phone with Denise she gave me the news that Metro newpaper did a Feature on our tour! It goes out to the whole country and has over 156,000 readers!
This is the largest scale of promotion we have had so far! And the article is incredible. Well, at least I think so. I feel as though it is the first time someone actually understood what we were trying to do but also gave us some credit for trying as hard as we do to get the work done. So for the rest of the blog I have actually received a downloaded copy of the article and if you get the chance, please open our picture section on our myspace site and look in the Uk Tour folder and you will be able to read the article they did for us!
Truly hope you enjoy it.
Oh…and the funny thing is that the get Ashley and Dakota mixed up! But the article is still such a compliment that this detail is easily overlooked.
Sleep well
Joshua of dirt jake replicas

p.s. here is the link!
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.editAlbumPhoto&albumID=2274653&imageID=32835470&MyToken=075b207e-320c-44d3-836a-4745d754a916

june 21st
Line ‘em up!
(day 5)

I don’t think any of us expected today’s events to unfold the way they did. I mean who has ever even heard of Sunderland UK? It is like asking someone from L.A. if they have ever heard of Scappoose.
Sunderland is a small town right on the coast in the northeast corner of England. This is the first time we have seen the ocean since we have been here….really not a big deal but I figured I would mention it.
Not many people are out and it is raining slightly so it doesn’t feel as though it is going to be a very promising night to play.
We were soooooo wrong.
As soon as 7 pm hit the entire town filled with hundreds of people….bus load after bus load. This town the ratio of girls to guys was more like 30 to 1. Everyone dressed to kill (or find a mate???) Honestly we thought that we were in the middle of Mardi Gras!
Instantly Dakota and I grab handfuls of fliers and cds and try to make an impression J
I lost count of how many times we heard “ooooo…I LOVE YOUR ACCENT!”
It was so much fun because everyone was already drunk and having a good time and we were like some famous rockstar from some far away land that added to their fun…not some annoying punks trying to bother people.
We had so many little encounters while promoting the show…it was just insane….if you see me you must ask about the girl that wanted my jumper…..awesome!
There are a ton of clubs along this small street and everyone is in the fashion show.
We are playing in a venue called The Dark which is located in the upstairs of a pub called The Borough. It is clearly the only dive bar in the area and has a very large group of locals. The pub is brought to life by two amazing people. Louise is the promoter that invited us to play and Grant is the bartender/owner/constant streaker of the pub.
The show went well but the best part was afterwards when both Louise and Grant invited us to stay.
They basically made it known that we were not leaving until they got us “FUCKING PISSED” which is what Grant made very very clear. We discussed it for a second and decided to repark the van to avoid a ticket. Once Dakota finished speaking with a member of Flock of Seagulls, that just happened to be at our show and loved it, he ran downstairs with myself and Ashley and fired up our “tour bus”. There was one spot left that happened to be right in front of two guys peeing on a dumpster. Dakota, acting tough, drives the van right up to the guys and the one guy turns around and starts to pee on the van along with trying to get us to fight him. I didn’t hear the whole thing take place but at one point he asked Ashley if we made her hide her face under her jumper and then said she should jump off a bridge! You really need to ask her all the details. REALLY REALLY FUNNY!
Back to the party. The pub gets shut down and a group of their friends and us spent the next few hours drinking way too many jag bombs and as many different kinds of free beer as possible. At one point, for a toast, Grant lines up 25 or so jag bombs on the bar and then puts the shot glasses on the seams until the last one, in which he slams a glass into it and like dominos the shot glasses go smacking and flying and flipping in all directions but somehow still land in their respective cups!! This was easily a favorite night of ours. We heard story after story, screamed at drunk people out the windows , watched Grant get naked like five times, and got REALLY PISSED! At one point Julius told Adam that he loves him!!!
It was great because they made us feel so at home. It was as if we were at the band house partying with all of our kick ass friends. Really good vibe and great people. The whole night is kind of a blur. I found it interesting that they have never had a Taco before OR Twinkies!!!! I just actually received Lousies address so I can send her some! They are missing out!
By the end of the night I do remember seeing a load of drunk people stumbling around the streets…people dressed in costumes….guys carrying girls….people almost falling over. Probably not the kind of place you want to be involved in every night but definitely a great place to go and experience.
I can’t wait to visit Sunderland again.
We arrived with handshakes and left with hugs.
When we arrived home, we again sat in disbelief of how much fun we just had. One by one we crawled off to bed and this night I decided to use one of the space blankets that Ashley had purchased for us while on tour. This is a 4’x8’ish sized piece of aluminum foil that they call a “blanket”. With the slightest move it would sound as though your chicken sandwich came to life and was trying to make a break for it out of its wrapper! I was laughing all night at the sound and then me laughing would make an even louder crinkling sound so I would laugh even more!!! It was great….but Ashley and Dakota might not feel the same!
Sleep well everyone
- Joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 20th
Great Big White World
(day 4)

I must be dreaming.
Have I been driving that long?
I know I am tired but I am kind of getting used to not sleeping and I feel as though something is just …..odd.
So here is the situation. I am driving from London to Halifax. We left after our first show and after a long day of no sleep. The clock says 3 am but it has to be 7:30?….maybe 8 am? IT IS SO BRIGHT!
I can see all the rolling hills. I can see dozens of stone houses in the distance. Small castles…maybe they are churches? Miles and miles of stone walls weaving and finally crash into each other over thousands of acres of land, drawing out property lines and building barriers between lambs with blue spray paint on their backs and lambs that have green spray paint on their backs. Damn you let the sheep play together! Damn you let the rabbits wear glasses!
I am working on my third wind …we pull over by a tiny house and go for a walk towards an unofficial viewpoint. There must have been four to five hours of “darkness”…which was never actually dark. It always looks like a sunset or a sunrise is about to occur.
Beautiful.
Everyone is awake now.
We reach Brian’s house around four in the morning and park on the sidewalk because the street is so narrow. The neighborhood is silent. Sleeping. Oh how I wish I could sleep. We are all growing restless though and decide since we have the address for our flat that we might as well just drive there and call him at 8 am when we are scheduled to meet him. On the way we see Sainsbury. The grocery store!!!! Cool. Flying through the parking lot I pull off a quick turn into a spot that reminds me of the car crash in the movie The Big Lebowski.
There is a crowd in front of the door to the store. Customers at this time?
Nope.
TROUBLE!
The overnight stock employees taking their break. The store is not open and doesn’t open until 8 am as well! They seem to not be interested in dirt jake replicas visiting their town. Go figure. Ashley’s father bought us a small nerf football with the tail on the end, you know the one from the early 90’s that can be thrown the distance of a football field? Great gift to have on tour! We break it out and begin to play around. Now the sky is WHITE WHITE WHITE….and it is maybe 5 o’clockish. The employees instantly come over and tell us to get out of there. So we decide to walk up to a gas station and play there. An hour passes and it is time to go back to the van and play with the hacky sack (I realize now that I have no idea how to spell it!) we figure playing with this won’t disturb the workers….but no no no. they again say we must stop.
We walk away…munching on a killer can of Pringles. Okay…I have an idea! Lets play baseball with the Pringles can and the sack. Sweet. Next thing I know, my teammate Julius is spread out on the cement grabbing his jaw! SHIT! Time to cancel the tour? He ran straight into Adams shoulder and it almost knocked him out. I guess it is time to really stop playing around and just wait.
The store opens and we get our first round of food for lunches and dinner. (in England it is dinner and supper). I then wake up Brian with a phone call and he urges me to bring coffee! Hahahaha.
We drive back to his house and meet him, Jane (his fine young lady) and Isobel (their fine young baby) let me say this…and I think I speak for everyone in the band when I say that these three people are THE MOST AMAZING PEOPLE ON EARTH! We are all instantly drawn into conversation and feel as though we are with family. Joking, laughing, making fun of Americans, testing each other on who can do the best accent.
It was perfect.
We grab a few clean towels and head back out on the road to the flat. Maybe this time we will make it!
WE DO!
Again we somehow get the best luck in the world. It is a massive flat in an old Victorian hospital! Big screen tv,, hundreds of cds, hundreds of dvds, (all of which are ones we own at home!) time to sleep! Blood shot eyes I pick my spot on the floor, Dakota has the big couch, Ashley the love seat (whore), Adam gets the bed upstairs in the room, and Julius spoons with Adam on the bed, (just kidding Julius, you like girls, you slept on the floor bedside the bed like Adams faithful old dog). We get four hours of sleep and it is time to go. Brian meets us back at the house and decides to drive us into Manchester for our gig at The Dry Bar. Manchester is not the kind of city that I like. I am more of a rural person to begin with, but there are cities that I think have a good feel to them. Manchester hasn’t really pulled me in yet. YET.
The venue is kick ass. Upstairs venue but we are playing in the basement (which has this very distinct urine/ body odor/aerosol pinesol stench to it. You kind of have to hold your breath for the first five minutes and gasp until you get used to it. I LOVE THIS PLACE! It is exactly what I pictured, you can just feel the energy in the smell. It kicks your ass and you end up loving it for doing so. The sound man approaches us spraying the aerosol can and asking what our setup is like. OH! I almost forgot. We almost didn’t get to play because a band that we were supposed to play four shows with cancelled their tour, and they said they took care of this show for us but upon arriving to the venue, the booker had said he had never heard of us! Since the aforementioned band cancelled that day we were able to take their slot….WHEW.
Back to the show.
Julius set up his stuff in a small corridor that I think was a separate bathroom to lazy people? Super cool as well….we made sure to eat subs there J We then had to race upstairs and move the van because a busy (which is what they call cops) was trying to place a ticket on our windshield for a parking violation.

Our show was way out of tune. Kind of a bummer. That’s the problem with playing 10 minute songs…when something goes out it is hard to adjust. We performed well and people snagged our free merch.
Later when we were loading the van brian comes out back and lets us know that the band upstairs is wearing our shirts while they play!!! He met them and asked them to do it so we ran inside and took tons of pictures! These guys are SOOOOOO good. They just bashed the crowd a pile! EVERYTHING ON RED….check them out. Loved it. We bought their cd and shirt and chatted for a little bit.
But it was time….
Time for what????
To sleep.
When we made it home (the flat) you would think that we would just stumble in and sleep in a pile by the coat closet just inside the door. Unable to get enough energy to even take our shoes off let alone walk all the way to our respective beds.
This didn’t happen. We are dumbasses. Again we stay up. Talking, laughing, looking back on the crazy day. Everything but what we should be doing.
We tell you often to sleep well.
Tonight. Please do so. For us.
-joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 19th
Shameless Self Promotion
(day 3)

I am not sure if I had mentioned in the last blog that everything closes SUPER early here. We’re talking 6 pm close time…EVERYTHING! But another thing is that everything opens late as well! And on Sunday a 4pm close time is the norm.
Luckily we can snag breakfast at THE GENERATOR.
Another beautiful day and another stressful drive through London traffic. I would say the only bad thing that I have seen in London is that they have this thing called a congestion fee. If you drive downtown during business hours you have to pay this crazy fee for something like 8 to 16 quid….that’s like $16-$24 EACH DAY! And then parking is measured in 6 minute increments in some places!!!!! Hahahaha. Very expensive.
First thing today we have to pick up our gear from a warehouse that ROCK-IT owns. They are such an amazing company.
At the warehouse we find out that our gear is right next to John Mayers, Him, and mogwais gear! Yeah I know what you are thinking ….real rockstars. Oh your not? Well we did! It was freaking awesome. We took so many pictures! ( I thought of you right away Mike from moses smells the roses!) The guys at rockit are kick ass. They seemed very excited about our tour because they don’t meet many independent bands doing it all on their own. They really made us feel as though we were doing the right thing.
I am not sure how but all of our gear, all of our merch, AND all of our suitcases fit inside the van! Packed as hell but it all fit. I will try and post pictures to give you an idea of what we were dealing with. Wait till you see Ashley’s cave!
The first venue we are playing at is called the Greyhorse. It is located right next to RAM JAM!!!! Awesome.
Our friends in slow burning car set us up with this place…I believe the history is that someone big like the stones used to play here??? All I know is that we arrive super early. But we are able to find parking pretty close, which is a major plus.
Dakota, Adam, and Julius go for a walk and begin to promote the show as Ashley and I stay back at the van to stuff our promotion cds with fliers and stickers.
Thank god the guys bring back a pizza for us…AMAZING PIZZA!
Promotion lasts a long time but we still have a few hours to spare so Ashley and I go for a long walk searching for a GPS cigarette adapter and a place to hook up to the internet to speak with you fine people!
No luck on either one. We asked a few people and they all said starbucks was the place to go. Not for the adapter, but for the internet obviously. Turning the corner we realize we are right in front of the starbucks!!! GREAT! Now all we have to do is open the door.
A simple task right?
Wrong.
There is a guy on the other side of the door so I go to open the door for him so he can get the hell out of our way and we can get online! <- kidding.
But yeah the door doesn’t budge.
OH! It must be a PUSH not a PULL.
That must be the problem right? Of course.
We move in for the push…..DENIED!
The man inside looks totally confused, but probably not HALF as confused and embarrassed as Ashley and I. So what do you do in this situation. The only thing you can do…RUN!!!!
We tore ass around the corner laughing our asses off and figured this was a good sign to give up on the internet for the day.
We reach the van just in time to move it to another location. We land a spot right next to the venue. Even better.
But we still have hours to wait. Those next few hours will be spent watching a crotch rocket alarm begin to beep and then blare WAAAA OOO WAAAA OOO for at least a few minutes then finally turn off just in time to begin beeping again. Even though not a single soul nears the bike.
Exciting huh? Honestly though it had been one of the most exciting parts of the day!
After load in we decide to pass out more cds to try to get people to the show. Now if you have never promoted before….you should TOTALLY come with us sometime. It is always a blast. We usually do it drunk but even when we do it sober it is a blast. I love peoples reactions. And so many funny encounters happen. We have had people threaten us, people completely ignore us as if we were not there, kicked out of places, crazy bums make sexual advances!! The list goes on. My favorite person today was this girl that was riding by on a bike. She rode right past me and said she could not stop. So then, my next victim, her friend that was directly behind her, I ran after. Waving the cd in the air and giving our elevator speech about being from the US on tour. She just kept smiling and riding. I some how caught up to her! She really just slowed down because she wanted the cd but didn’t want to act like she did. We talk for a minute and she seems really excited and I look ahead…who is waiting? The first girl!!!! Kick ass. Got you girl!
Not many people arrive for our set. Basically play to the bands. It was a good first show…especially for not playing in a while due to our gear being shipped out a while in advance. The most memorable part was when the power went out because of our transformers.
Scared the shit out of me! I was super concerned that most places would not be able to support our transformers and we would be left without instruments to play.
On a side note- for anyone that doesn’t know – the UK uses a different plug and power output so we had to spend a large chunk of cash on mega heavy transformers so it could support our gear.
After the initial trip of the breaker there was never another problem.
When we loaded the gear back into the van and put the van in drive to pull away we saw a gigantic fox just roaming around the streets!!! Very different from seeing raccoon.
Now, even though we have still not slept in forever we are going to drive to Halifax tonight to our friend Brian Watsons house so he can let us in the flat. Pretty excited to meet Brian. I will definitely let you know how it goes tomorrow!
As for right now….it is time to drive, drive, drive.

Sleep well
-joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 18th
Clipside of the Pinkeye Flight
(day 2)

This plane is huge.
HUGE

It is possible?
Something this massive to take flight and carry this many people with all of their 50 lbs. bags (or up to 75 lbs. for a small fee)?

A screen flickers and an extremely pixilated version of the earth appears…there is a long crescent shaped line starting from Seattle WA arching upward and finally crashing to a stop on what is labeled London. A flash again and several numbers are being displayed now….Time: 10 hrs….distance: 4783m ….arrival time 4:05pm…etc.

I am not keen on flying. One of my only fears for the tour was not if we would be able to get enough money, or crashing the van while driving on the opposite site, not even fearing some strange situation similar to Hostel where we are kidnapped and sold to murders….all that is fine…but a ten hour flight across the ocean. Whew,,,,chills.

I eventually get to a point during flight where I accept the fact that the plane will go down and there is nothing that I can do about it…and I give in to the possibility of death. Once I do that I can relax for the rest of the flight.

This flight starts off a little oddly. Of course I check all the little knobs (Final Destination style) and look over the safety manual ten times…but then there is a disturbance…my main man Julius is asked to switch spots with this mega hotties boyfriend and he is sent away (we are all sitting separate on the plane). As I watch him walk away I see a man from the airline asking a passenger to get his things and get off the plane. They discuss it long enough to have everyone on the plane looking but the man FINALLY gets up and leaves. He was actually sitting right next to Adam and I get the full heads up later on. Basically the guy was Pissed (pissed as in WASTED) and he was telling people to Fuck off and such. OH and a side note…Adam was lucky enough to sit next to the man that looks like Soup, who happened to be caring a metal suitcase that was handcuffed to his arm!!!! They never spoke one word to each other.

I will work on getting some photos online for you all to see. Maybe it will be a better reference??

Anyways…the leviathan creaks and waves as it takes flight. The screen in front switches to Airobics….still pretty nervous and not very amused by the clever title.
This video is four woman, one whom reminds me very much of this wonderful girl Nikki I had once worked with in my fast food days, sitting in massive airplane chairs doing various chair workout moves to keep you alert. No one does any of the moves…but god damn did I laugh my ass off! It worked!

The movie selection was INCREDIBLE! I spent more time trying to decide what to watch than I did actually viewing!
I ended up winding down to a few romantic comedies. Total rockstar huh?
Northwest Airlines is amazing because they bring massive food portions and drinks NONSTOP! I am talking every few minutes they were bringing us lasagna or cheese. They really kicked ass at keeping everyone happy.

Less than 10 hours later…without a second of shuteye….we arrive at Heathrow Airport, which is said to be the worst airport in the world!
Half dead we crawl off the plane and make our way towards customs.
The moment of truth or I guess in our case, LIES!
We stop at the bathroom and go over our stories again:
So what happens if they ask us where we are staying?
What about all of the DJR shirts?
What about this….that….etc.
I slap on the tired face and begin to rub my eyes as I approach the counter. Thinking this will help make me look less suspicious???? Turns out it is a fucking BREEZE to get through! Hahahaha we all laugh and jump up and down while exiting the airport. First task down. Now where do we pick up our van?

A shuttle drives us for about 15 to 20 minutes and I begin to realize that I have no clue what the road signs are! I quickly start looking out the side windows….a red circle with a number in it..a colored in blue circle with a red “X”…what the hell are those squiggly white lines on the road? I start to panic. I have not slept in over twenty four hours, this is probably the WORST time to learn how to drive in another country!

When we get to Alamo I wait in line for a little while with Dakota…still trying to memorize all of the signs I had just seen and trying to figure out what they could possibly mean. The lady calls me up to the counter and takes down my information. As she is looking through the list on her computer she asks me nonchalantly if I am in a band. Just as the smile forms on my face, my stomach turns and I quickly answer. “noooo…I just look like I am.” With the most innocent smile I can produce on no sleep. Whew…got away with another lie….you see for some odd reason they do not allow bands to rent their vehicles…she was a tricky one!
This is the most I have lied since I was seven!
It took us probably 20 minutes just to find the brand new Plymouth grand voyager in the parking lot of cars. It is PERFECT!
We could not asked for a better sized vehicle!
And it is diesel which is kick ass.
With all of our suitcase piled in the back…I sit in the drivers seat breathing deeply.
Trying to focus and relax. WOW I am nervous….something that rarely happens. This is really it. We are off. I have to just turn the key , put it in drive and step on the gas. By the way I was so glad it was not a standard. I would have shit.
I realize everyone is kind of staring at me. Waiting. I give up on calming myself down and decide it is now or never. I instantly go in the wrong direction and try to get out the exit!
A few minutes later the GPS is talking to me in a beautiful female british accent telling me which way to go downtown. (later that night I read a little article saying to NEVER try driving in downtown London during rush hour when you are just beginning to drive. It makes me feel semi accomplished.) downtown London is INSANE!!!!!!!!!!
The oldest buildings I have ever seen. All made of brick, sporting ancient statues and gargoyles. There are people everywhere. The ratio of girls to guys MUST be 20 to 1.
And they are ALL beautiful.
Any straight man or gay female would be in heaven here.
Back to the driving.
I could never describe it to you. Cars everywhere….everything opposite….not wrong….just opposite. Motorcycles and bicycles drive in between every car. And there is no way that I have found yet to distinguish which way you should be heading. I can’t tell if a road is one way or two way.
We almost get in one slight accident by going the wrong way down a road. But all in all we actually make it to the hotel that we will be staying in tonight.
Funny thing is that we booked a night in a hotel….but the website we went through was actually selling us a night in a hostel. Which would be fine but we only reserved two beds.
Do that math….two beds….five people.
Soooooooo we discuss who will sleep in the van after trying to get the people to let us all in. Ashley ends up snagging up a couple of extra beds and we all crash in the strangely decorated Generator Hostel. Neon lights families and foreign people galore. The beds are gross and the elevator…wait…LIFT….holds myself and a small puppy. The room next to us is full of stuff. Like the people there LIVE there…video games even!
Still no sleep….
Eventually we turn off the lights and begin to ask questions:
Stuff like if you had to eat poop or vomit, what would you do?
Or if you had to sleep with one animal what animal would it be?
I strap on Ashley’s bra and scare the crap out of Julius while he is sleeping and Dakota flirts with the idea of pooping in the sink and telling the office that the toilet won’t flush!
Laughter rings out of our door way later than it should.
Pretty much the only way to end a day like this.
Tomorrow is our first show over seas. I can’t wait to begin playing and forget about the initial hard parts of the tour.

Sleep well
-joshua of dirt jake replicas

june 17th
No Turning Back
(day 1)

we will actually begin this the day earlier june 16th…

“Hey Joshua. Good luck with your music and your tour!” This is what Frank Hudson had said to me while jamming an air guitar as I passed by him. I put out the most uncomfortable smile in history as I thanked him and kept walking.
I had just stepped off the stand after being questioned as a witness to two horrific murders he would eventually be accused of committing almost a year ago. It made me question a lot of things…well not only this one incident….but possibly the fact that during the trial I was questioned more and commented more on my upcoming U.K. tour than about the murders. The prosecutor, the judge, slight gasps rang out followed by smiles and blushing, from everyone in the courtroom after the subject came up. Don’t get me wrong, I never shut up when talking about our band, but for some reason, for the first time in my life, I really felt as though our band was probably the second most important thing in the world.
As I left the courtroom it took me all of three seconds to move on. I mean come on…we ARE leaving for the U.K. in the morning!!! Time to get focused and do all the finishing touches!

Well those finishing touches ended up being drinking WAY too much Blue Moon and jumping off of my front porch yet again, breaking the bushes in half and slicing a 7” gash across my back. Not to mention having contests with Ashley on who can be the first person to catch the other persons spit in their mouth from six feet away.

In the morning I had Ashley drop by and give me a ride home. Two extremely hung over individuals about to take part in the single most important moment of their life. We did alright. We stopped in to say goodbye to Soup and Matt Strong. Killer names by the way.
Although it was maybe 6 in the morning, Soup came out dressed in black…the normal Soup attire…everything but the boots. Not too sure if he had just awoke or had not gone to bed at all. We sat for a moment, took pictures, said goodbye and assured him the we would look after his newly acquired roommate Girth Brooks (the massive dildo that we found in the Nevada desert, which is our band mascot, and which we will be taking for one last trip with us to photograph along the way. Soup happened to win him at our summer fund raising BBQ.)

Everyone arrives at my house…even the Comcast man to fix our internet!
We go through our “stories” that we will tell customs when we approach the gate to enter the country. We had heard many stories about being rejected and being sent back…even by a band that we are supposed to play with in just a few days. She was sent back to the U.S..
Basically this is one of the most stressful parts of the tour for us. We have spent sooo much time and money and energy on this tour….months and months and it can easily just end before it begins if we get stopped. We were supposed to get permission slips to do the tour but the thing is that they don’t give them out unless you are huge. Which although I would love to say we are…..we are not. One thing I really respect about the members of this band is that they will do ANYTHING that needs to be done. And this is a perfect example…risking it all just for the chance to hopefully tour.

We say our goodbyes to the loved ones…repacked our bags and go over our checklists five more times (passports, ID, “vacation packets”, etc.) finally packing all five of us and our luggage into Ashley’s tiny blue, crayon-smelling VW.

On our way to Seattle we stop a million times…the bank, our houses for shit we forgot, blah blah, but at least we stopped for food! Subway is what we ate…our last American meal for three weeks, which happened to be donated to us from Paul. Thanks Paul….Ashley got her cookie!

When we reach Aubrey and Chris’s house, who will be dropping us off at SEATAC airport, we are greeted by two little dogs that think they are great danes. I instantly forget their names because we were thrown into a game of ROCKBAND.
I am not a huge fan of video games…I think the only one I have ever had a love for is the original Silent Hill (which made me wake up with poop in my diaper) So I begin the game as a total skeptic. But by the third round, when Julius is screeching out Rush vocals for the song Tom Sawyer, there was no turning back for any of us! We contemplated skipping the tour, getting a case of beer, and just telling everyone we went on tour.

Finally getting to the airport we find our first Girth Brooks victim. An older man and his friend at the departure point. Just waiting for someone to come up and ask them to take a picture with a ten pound dildo!

Oh dear god, the lady at the NWA check in point was amazing…trying to sell us better tickets to the U.K. if we leave the next day….saying “boingo boingo boingo” and asking us to say hello to the queen for her, we decline and move on to the security checkpoint………………I know what you are thinking……….and believe me….i was thinking the same thing! Will we make it through with out getting caught with drugs or knives or god forbid a tube of toothpaste larger than 3 oz.????

The answer is yes! We made it. And only managed to have two people leave their passports behind before we made it to our gate!

We sat at the gate for hours…no smiles…no talking…no joking….just waiting. We have waited almost a year for this moment and we couldn’t even muster a slight amount of excitement. The only explanation I can think of is that we were ready for it. Completely 100% prepared to show the queen that dirt jake replicas is going to show them something new and exciting.

As we line up to get on the plane there is a man in line that looks just like Soup. A sign? Maybe.
Either way it was time to board the plane.

In ten hours we will be on foreign soil.

Wish us luck.
Sleep well
-joshua of dirt jake replicas

HELLO EVERYONE!!!!!
we made it!
after three weeks of no showers/ no clean clothes/ crazy shows/ amazing people/ and no internet we finally returned back to the U.S. last night.

so what does this mean for all of you?

this means we will FINALLY be posting our daily blogs and video blogs on our site beginning tomorrow!!!!!

we apologize for not having this feature while on tour....we would have loved to been able to do it but unfortunately we were stuck. hopefully you will be able to take the time to read the blogs now. we promise some AWESOME stories!

so many great little adventures we had. we met a million people and had some great coverage of the tour (a feature that went out to 156,000 people, a three hour radio show that had 12,000 listeners, we were on M TV, and also had coverage from portlands very own KPTV fox !)
and sooooo much more.

thank you to everyone that sent out the luck and the hundreds of you that helped us with the tour!!!!

and thank you to all the new fans/friends/family we gained in the U.K. you have all made us feel so welcome and cannot thank you enough.


so please check the sites starting tomorrow to get our first blog!!!!

see you then!!!!!!

sleep well
dirt jake replicas

hello everyone!

TONS of huge news for you here!
dirt jake replicas will be leaving june 17th to fly over to the
United Kingdom for a three week tour!!! But you already knew
that...what you may not have known is that you will be right there
with us! Thats right...we have got it all worked out to do daily
VIDEO entries in our blog for you so YOU CAN SEE US TOUR!

we will do everything we can to keep you up-to-date on all of the
shows/fun/mishaps/food/drinks/people and sites that we run into!!!

we will also have the more conventional tour diary on this myspace
site for you to read about some things that may not get covered in
the video blog!!!!!

we have changed all of the sites to get setup for the tour, complete
with many new reviews (please come read) and links and also a new DJR
store with better clothing for you to choose from (which will get
updated more and more in the coming weeks).

the nexts few weeks will have a ton of news about the tour and about
certain special projects that we plan on doing once we are back in
town! so please do check in as much as possible and please let us
know how you think everything looks and what you want to hear about
while we are traveling. this tour is as much yours as it is ours. you
have all done so much to help us through this tour and YOU have made
this possible for us. we cannot thank you enough...so hopefully we
can keep you all entertained while we are on the other side of the
world!

we will see you all for our return home show (august 7th...all ages)
at hawthorne theatre!

sleep well
dirt jake replicas

hey everyone.

well, the garage sale was a success. thanks to everyone who came out and supported. and thanks to everyone who donated items to sell.

we’re currently finishing the last details of the tour. we leave in less than a month for our uk tour and are super excited. this tour would still be a dream if it wasn’t for the outpouring of support from friends, fans, and family. thanks for helping us reach our goal everyone.

when we get back to town we’ll be playing a ‘return home show,’ at the Hawthorne theater. this show is the next local show we have planned right now. we know it seems like a long time away, but don’t fret, summer will go by in a snap like it always does. make sure to mark your calendars for august 7th for our return home show.

if you’ve ever seen a djr show, then you’ve probably seen and met our good friends Catfight! they have been slaving in the studios for a long time now, working on their album. they’ve finished it (it sounds amazing) and are holding a cd release show also in august at the ash st. saloon. make it a point to come out and check them out. they’re an incredible band, and have been monstrously supportive of us in our endeavors. the date on that is august 16th.

thanks again everyone, put on your sunscreen.

sleep well.

-dirt jake replicas

hi everyone!!!

sorry for the delay on the updates. here’s the latest:

first of all, thank you to everyone who came out to the Benefit BBQ.
it was an amazing turnout and a fantastic show. we’re nothing without our friends and family, and it was spectacular to have everyone there for this show.
thank you all sincerely.
special thanks to Catfight! and Lonesome Radio Heart
who played phenomenally and who we are so grateful were part of the show.

our last event before the tour is this weekend.
this is our garage sale and ALL PROCEEDS
go to the tour budget.
if you have ANY items you’d like to donate for sales, please contact:

Ashley@dirtjakereplicas.com OR Joshua@dirtjakereplicas.com

we would be more than happy to pick up any and all items.

if you are in the market for anything or just enjoy garage sales, come out to the band house this weekend. we have LOTS and LOTS of good items like:

-leather chairs
-dining room table
-bookshelves
-cabinets
-clothes
-items for baby
-microwaves
-mattresses
-speakers
-stereos
-shoes
-curtains

anything you could possibly think of, we probably have.

so please come out and buy some new-to-you things to kick off the garage sale season, and to support dirt jake replicas UK Tour which
will be here in just a little over a month!!!

the garage sale will be held at:

8023 N. John Ave
Portland, OR 97203

that’s THIS saturday starting at 7am,
depending on the sales we will also be selling on sunday.

thank you all for your love an support.
we are nothing with out our friends, fans, and family.

sleep well.

-dirt jake replicas

hello everyone!

just a quick update to let you all know how things are going.

you should all check out the tour schedule. at this point we’re almost
done booking and very proud of all the hard work.

our tour date is fast approaching and as it jogs closer we want to
thank you all for your continual support of us
through donations for our garage sale which is coming up in may,
and those new friends over seas who have been helping us
with the booking and specifics of the tour.

thanks again to Catfight! for selling a guitar
online in support of the tour.

thanks again to Brian Watson for his support with the apartment in europe.

and please everyone, don’t forget

APRIL 26th is our Benefit BBQ.

this is a great way to support the band and have an awesome time doing it!!!

we have a few other tricks up our sleeves before we leave so keep checking for updates.

thanks again everyone!

sleep well
-dirt jake replcias

hello everyone!

we hope you had an excellent st. paddy’s day.

we want to remind you of a few things today.
don’t forget to put april 26th on your calendar.

for the first time ever, dirt jake replicas will be
playing an ACOUSTIC set!

come play with us and help us raise money for our UK tour starting in june.

it starts at 3pm on a saturday so you have no reason to be any where else.

we’re also continuing to collect items for our tour garage sale.
any old clothes, furniture, kitchenware, appliances,
tools or any junk you don’t want any more,
we will come pick up for you and sell to help pay for our tour.

sleep well.

-dirt jake replicas